The Vernacular of Self-Deprecating Narcissists

It has become a strange world we live in; the most humble people you’ll find have their noses in the air and the people who think the most highly of themselves refer to themselves as lowly waste. Paradoxically, these people are one in the same.

Most self-deprecating narcissists are built out of a childhood consisting of low self-esteem and a lack of confidence. Some are introverted, others outgoing and extroverted. Most identify somewhere in between. They have built their personalities out of intense observation and assimilation of personality traits they admire. Most self-deprecating narcissists I have met have highly empathic personalities, and both intimidate and inspire those around them.

Unfortunately, these personalities have difficulty finding one another because they are easily intimidated by the energy the others put out. Once that social blockage is breached, however, these groups become powerhouses of intuitional, social, or creative change (which, note, also includes, but is not limited to, mechanical, technological, and agricultural creativity).

However emotionally intelligent and supportive these individuals are towards others, they normally use either bland or kingly speech in order to describe themselves-and both, I have learned, are in order to satirically describe a sense of self they are struggling to find words for. In order to empower others, it is necessary to not think too highly of oneself and deal on an equal social platform, but in order to lead, one must put themselves on a separate platform as well. Thus is this strange paradox required.

In my generation, self-deprecating narcissists have adopted a comical approach to leadership, and some of their vocabulary can be understood as follows:

Trash-a way of appearing or acting in such a way that does not require another individual’s opinion to change or continue their traits.

Queen-An inspiration, a leader, a caretaker, a ruler.

Goddess-An ethereal being, an impossibility, a mystical creature.

Dad-For some reason, this is the masculine version of Queen. I am unsure as to why it isn’t simply ‘King’ but that’s social language for you.

Geek/Nerd/Punk-One of the highest compliments that can be given or received, these former insults are now indicative of one’s interest-whether romantically or platonically-in another human. These are reserved for human beings whom are not intimate enough for, or uncomfortable with, elaborate words that tell of one’s affection, but are understanding enough of the indicator’s vernacular to not misinterpret these pet names.

Gross-This adjective remains similar, but differs in the sense that it can also be positive. It refers sometimes to the extreme (excessive PDA/booger picking/etc.), but may also refer to the mundane (cute PDA/looking at oneself in the mirror/etc.).

These terms are the tip of the iceberg, and are not all used by self-deprecating narcissists. They vary immensely, and rarely mold to your initial impression of them.

They are sensitive, brash individuals, and should simultaneously be taken seriously and never taken seriously at all.

Much love,


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